So I'm dual posting thing on myspace and this site from now on. Reason being is I want to make it a little easier for people to read my blog and see my photos. Oh, and also because I'm making my myspace site private again after a recent run in with someone....long story. Anyways, the new posts are actually old ones and are posted backwards to start at the bottom and read up. New blogs will be in the correct order:)
Oh, and hope you like it J!
11.29.2006
O Canada.....
So what do three chicks (two of which are very drunk) do at 230 in the morning???? GO TO CANADA! Yes that's right folks, we invaded Canada last night.
It started out as a trip to the cemetary in Riverside to Weegie the spirits (don't ask) and turned into a 3 hour tour to the land of the Maple Leaf. We were in search of the stars and Northern Lights (we were to late) and headed North (imagine that....the Northern Lights...in the NORTH!!) and kept on driving....well, kept on driving after the Spanish Inquisition we encountered.
GOOD GOD! The last time I tried to go to Canada it was on a similar wind and the Canadians welcomed us with open arms! This time....not so much. "Why are you coming into Canada at 3am? Where are you going? Where do you live? Where are your business cards (for the other two)? Have you been drinking? When was the last time you were in Canada? If you are bored why didn't you go someplace in the US? (answer: because it sucks and we've been there and done that...duh!) All the while there were two stupid drunk girls w/ me giggling and talking about drugs up the ass and body cavity searches and me trying not to laugh and make them shut up so we didn't get turned back. So we were told that "Well maybe if you don't have your business cards we won't let you into Canada because Canada is really closed right now because there is no immigration officer and (this is ad-lib) maybe not having business cards is enough to keep you from entering the country."
So last time I checked, business cards were not a requirement for entry....whatever. So they let us in "this time" and we proceeded to drive to Osooyos, BC where they are supposed to have a warm as bath water lake....LIED TO! Not warm as bath water but not freezing either. Canada is so clean.....and their chocolate is better then ours. Were you all aware that Canadian chocolate has no wax, unlike the US version....and the packaging is much nicer. OH! and to give you an idea of the remote area I live in....there are no 7-Elevens....except 50mi away in CANADA!
So after an hour we came back to the Land of the Free and Hoooooooome of the Brave. It was a slightly dissapointing re-entry into the hellmouth and we came home on the tailwinds of the drunk appletruck driver in front of us. So all in all...another exciting night in the......NORTH FORTY!
It started out as a trip to the cemetary in Riverside to Weegie the spirits (don't ask) and turned into a 3 hour tour to the land of the Maple Leaf. We were in search of the stars and Northern Lights (we were to late) and headed North (imagine that....the Northern Lights...in the NORTH!!) and kept on driving....well, kept on driving after the Spanish Inquisition we encountered.
GOOD GOD! The last time I tried to go to Canada it was on a similar wind and the Canadians welcomed us with open arms! This time....not so much. "Why are you coming into Canada at 3am? Where are you going? Where do you live? Where are your business cards (for the other two)? Have you been drinking? When was the last time you were in Canada? If you are bored why didn't you go someplace in the US? (answer: because it sucks and we've been there and done that...duh!) All the while there were two stupid drunk girls w/ me giggling and talking about drugs up the ass and body cavity searches and me trying not to laugh and make them shut up so we didn't get turned back. So we were told that "Well maybe if you don't have your business cards we won't let you into Canada because Canada is really closed right now because there is no immigration officer and (this is ad-lib) maybe not having business cards is enough to keep you from entering the country."
So last time I checked, business cards were not a requirement for entry....whatever. So they let us in "this time" and we proceeded to drive to Osooyos, BC where they are supposed to have a warm as bath water lake....LIED TO! Not warm as bath water but not freezing either. Canada is so clean.....and their chocolate is better then ours. Were you all aware that Canadian chocolate has no wax, unlike the US version....and the packaging is much nicer. OH! and to give you an idea of the remote area I live in....there are no 7-Elevens....except 50mi away in CANADA!
So after an hour we came back to the Land of the Free and Hoooooooome of the Brave. It was a slightly dissapointing re-entry into the hellmouth and we came home on the tailwinds of the drunk appletruck driver in front of us. So all in all...another exciting night in the......NORTH FORTY!
"Shhhh...be vewy, vewy qwiet..."
Been awhile so here's a quick update:
1) Job search sux but there is a possible position that I'm more than qualified for and REALLY want so light those goddess and Jesus candles and keep your toes crossed folks!
2) We are probably going to lose almost 3/4 of our usable front yard space to the douchhead and cuntface neighboors next door. Long story that I'll be happy to regail you with if you want.
3) A new member of the family may be emminent! Don't Jinx it!
4) I was either confused for a homosexual man, straight man, or possibly not confused for anything at all while trying to take care of some business at the Clinic here in Omak. Either my longer hair really makes me look masculine and it needs to go back to the old 'do OR people here really need some diversity training...maybe a little from column A and a little from column B.
5) We will be on a Whirlwind tour of Spokane Nov 3-5 sign up sheet will follow...no, seriously, email if you want to see us:)
6) Qwest sux!
1) Job search sux but there is a possible position that I'm more than qualified for and REALLY want so light those goddess and Jesus candles and keep your toes crossed folks!
2) We are probably going to lose almost 3/4 of our usable front yard space to the douchhead and cuntface neighboors next door. Long story that I'll be happy to regail you with if you want.
3) A new member of the family may be emminent! Don't Jinx it!
4) I was either confused for a homosexual man, straight man, or possibly not confused for anything at all while trying to take care of some business at the Clinic here in Omak. Either my longer hair really makes me look masculine and it needs to go back to the old 'do OR people here really need some diversity training...maybe a little from column A and a little from column B.
5) We will be on a Whirlwind tour of Spokane Nov 3-5 sign up sheet will follow...no, seriously, email if you want to see us:)
6) Qwest sux!

So as some of you may or may not know, we have a new member in the family. He was delivered to us by the Gods and Godesses of the Okanogan Valley and we are thankful for his presence...even when he's peeing on the floor or chewing on my bra....yes, even then.
So his name is Muuphy and he is a 4-6th month old Boxer puppy. He's is fawn and has huge feet, a fugly squished up face, loose wrinkly skin....and a stinky ass! He was abandoned as a wee pup and the people that found him thought he'd make a good horse tripping dog (which , if you know anything about Boxers, is ridiculous).
He's very sweet and very hyper and seems to fit in just fine here at the homestead. Nero likes him just fine except that Murphy won't leave Nero's wang alone and constantly has his head in Nero's crotch....it's weird. Butchie isn't quite as fond of him but is warming up considerably as the days go by.
He likes visitors so please come and visit:)
News from the 'Nogan
So here are some things that EVERYONE should know about life in Okanogan Valley, WA
A)
1. When the US Capitol Xmas Tree comes to Tonasket, it's a HUGE deal. The whole town turned out to see a 80+ft xmas tree that was completley wrapped in tarps except the point and placed on a flatbed truck with an ARMED, government employee. That's right, we as taxpayers have footed the bill for a caravan with 2 RV's and an armed guard for a XMAS TREE! I'm sure that's what the terrorists like to attack..trees, maybe they fear eco-terrorists...I'm not sure. Theorys are welcome!

2) We have been waking up to snow covered mountains for the past week and it's absolutely gorgeous. Apparently there is some excellent skiing up here so all you skiers should definitely come up and teach me how to ski!
B)
1. As you may be able to guess from my ramblings thus far, living in a small town is a strange and sometimes amusing thing. In the newspapers up here they publish a weekly police blotter w/ the majority of the calls that came into the Sheriff's and Police Dispatch Offices. We have been in this blotter for the "pearing" we experinced. That's right folks, a "pearing". For those of you who don't know what a "pearing" is it's when stupid kids of cracked out, toothless townies run by your house and throw unripe pears at your windows in attempt to shatter them. As Sunshine is a public defender up here, we promtly reported this to the authorities in case it was a precursor to something more. So as a result, I've decided to start posting some of the funnier reports, or at least what we think are the funnier ones. Comments are apperciated
Oct. 30th
A woman called the police after three juveniles came to her house saying they were with the Omak High School and they were selling Trick-or-Treat insurance for Halloween. The caller thought it was a scam. A call to the high school confirmed the school's band was selling such insurance.
Oct. 31st
A man was stopped at the doors at Wal-Mart when buzzers went off. The suspect grabbed two bags out of his shopping cart and bolted out the doors, leaving two bad behind. The suspect also dropped his wallet and ID in the parking lot. Police were searching for a 24-year-old man.
A caller reported a vehicle with kids egging cars and houses. Police stopped the suspect vehicle with an Okanogan woman. She and a male juvenile passenger admitted to the eggings. The had eggs in their vehicle. No damage was done to property of reporting party. Both suspects were advised to find something better to do with their free time and released.
Nov. 2nd
A woman reported people throwing snowballs at her residence on N. Douglas at 1:10am. Police contacted subjects next door having a snowball fight. They said they were not throwing at her residence, though some of the snowballs may have accidentally gone into her yard. They were told to be more careful with their aim.
A caller reported a very agressive vacuum salesperson on South Ash at 6:32pm. The person tried to enter the residence.
Nov 3rd
Police went to Ferry Street at 9:30pm and overheard a woman yelling, then saw a woman roll down stairs. The woman was arrested on suspicion of assualting a male caller. A deputy then served the woman with papers. She was taken to jail.
Nov 4th
A 52-year-old-man was contacted at 11:50pm on North Main for possible disorderly conduct. He was cited and released for deposit of an unwholesome substance. (and exactly what is an unwholesome substance I ask?)
Nov 5th
A woman on Dayton said there was a snake in her baseboard heater. The snake looked like a rattlesnake. An officer checked the bedroom and the heater but was unable to locate a snake.
Nov 9th
Police were told that a 90-year-old-man at a north Omak care home tried to use a motorized wheelchair to run over an 88-year-old-man. Those at the business on North Locust were given some options.
And that's the news from the 'nogan!
A)
1. When the US Capitol Xmas Tree comes to Tonasket, it's a HUGE deal. The whole town turned out to see a 80+ft xmas tree that was completley wrapped in tarps except the point and placed on a flatbed truck with an ARMED, government employee. That's right, we as taxpayers have footed the bill for a caravan with 2 RV's and an armed guard for a XMAS TREE! I'm sure that's what the terrorists like to attack..trees, maybe they fear eco-terrorists...I'm not sure. Theorys are welcome!

2) We have been waking up to snow covered mountains for the past week and it's absolutely gorgeous. Apparently there is some excellent skiing up here so all you skiers should definitely come up and teach me how to ski!
B)
1. As you may be able to guess from my ramblings thus far, living in a small town is a strange and sometimes amusing thing. In the newspapers up here they publish a weekly police blotter w/ the majority of the calls that came into the Sheriff's and Police Dispatch Offices. We have been in this blotter for the "pearing" we experinced. That's right folks, a "pearing". For those of you who don't know what a "pearing" is it's when stupid kids of cracked out, toothless townies run by your house and throw unripe pears at your windows in attempt to shatter them. As Sunshine is a public defender up here, we promtly reported this to the authorities in case it was a precursor to something more. So as a result, I've decided to start posting some of the funnier reports, or at least what we think are the funnier ones. Comments are apperciated
Oct. 30th
A woman called the police after three juveniles came to her house saying they were with the Omak High School and they were selling Trick-or-Treat insurance for Halloween. The caller thought it was a scam. A call to the high school confirmed the school's band was selling such insurance.
Oct. 31st
A man was stopped at the doors at Wal-Mart when buzzers went off. The suspect grabbed two bags out of his shopping cart and bolted out the doors, leaving two bad behind. The suspect also dropped his wallet and ID in the parking lot. Police were searching for a 24-year-old man.
A caller reported a vehicle with kids egging cars and houses. Police stopped the suspect vehicle with an Okanogan woman. She and a male juvenile passenger admitted to the eggings. The had eggs in their vehicle. No damage was done to property of reporting party. Both suspects were advised to find something better to do with their free time and released.
Nov. 2nd
A woman reported people throwing snowballs at her residence on N. Douglas at 1:10am. Police contacted subjects next door having a snowball fight. They said they were not throwing at her residence, though some of the snowballs may have accidentally gone into her yard. They were told to be more careful with their aim.
A caller reported a very agressive vacuum salesperson on South Ash at 6:32pm. The person tried to enter the residence.
Nov 3rd
Police went to Ferry Street at 9:30pm and overheard a woman yelling, then saw a woman roll down stairs. The woman was arrested on suspicion of assualting a male caller. A deputy then served the woman with papers. She was taken to jail.
Nov 4th
A 52-year-old-man was contacted at 11:50pm on North Main for possible disorderly conduct. He was cited and released for deposit of an unwholesome substance. (and exactly what is an unwholesome substance I ask?)
Nov 5th
A woman on Dayton said there was a snake in her baseboard heater. The snake looked like a rattlesnake. An officer checked the bedroom and the heater but was unable to locate a snake.
Nov 9th
Police were told that a 90-year-old-man at a north Omak care home tried to use a motorized wheelchair to run over an 88-year-old-man. Those at the business on North Locust were given some options.
And that's the news from the 'nogan!
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